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A
great number of my clients are women who have spouse
problems. I am not saying that only women have spouse
problems… men also have them, but I don't see them
as often as I do women. Sometimes the spouse problem
is that the women is involved with the spouse of another
woman and now we have two women with spouse problems
and one of them may not even know that she has a problem.
In most
cases I encounter, the men have the upper hand in the
relationship whether the women are married to the man
or he is the husband of another woman. The men don't
seem to be as concerned about the relationship problem
as much as the women are and so it is the women who
usually suffer the most in these situations. In addition,
women are, I think, much more trusting and caring than
men and are more easily hurt emotionally than men are.
Women,
in our society, mainly seem to derive much of their
emotional security from being "connected"
to a man whether in marriage or not. Even if the man
does not work and is a leach on the woman who works,
she still seems to need the emotional security of the
relationship much more than the man does. I often see
beautiful women who are working at high paying jobs
and who are intellectually the superior of the lout
she is in a relationship with become clinically depressed
if he threatens to leave her.
I also
see many women in high paying jobs who are "involved"
with married men in the "hope" that he will
leave his present wife and be with them. Often, the
man encourages this relationship. Why should he not?
The woman is beautiful… she gives him all the sex
he wants and it does wonders for his male ego. The man
also has a built in support structure so that now he
can leave his original spouse and not be lonely or wanting
for anything. He is, literally, free to play the field
of women leading her on to believe that "someday
soon" they will probably be married and the poor
women is radiant that she has this chance to be his
next wife. The reason often given for not getting married
is that "we have to both experience this freedom
for a while until we get to know each other better"
even though they have had the relationship for several
years.
I am not
a marriage counselor or relationship counselor or in
fact any kind of counselor. I am a hypnotherapist and
I see the ravages of this relationship insecurity in
depression, anxiety, physical illness and other manifestations
of mental, emotional, physical and spiritual stress
because that is what it boils down to. Men can also
have this insecurity stress, but it appears less pronounced
in relationships and more in connection with their jobs.
However, the insecurity stress is produced; it is deadly
to the person affected.
It is deadly
in that it causes the body's systems to begin secreting
adrenaline and other flight or flight chemicals and
these can destroy the body if not dealt with. What is
even worse is the anxiety and stress produced lowers
the physical and psychic immune systems and leaves us
open for the attachment of microbes and virus's and
the attachment of foreign energies that can literally
destroy us.
Earthbound
Spirits, Demons, Soul-Mind Fragments of other people
living or dead as well as alien energies and destructive
thought forms can easily attach to us if our psychic
defense system is down. We can also self-fragment producing
harmful ego states within ourselves that can negatively
affect our lives. Entity attachments or other effects
of relationship insecurity can devastate our lives so
we should guard against them.
If you
are in an insecure relationship… however it is
defined, think about the consequences of the stress
to your overall mental, emotional, spiritual and physical
health. Find a good hypnotherapist who can help you
sort out what is happening to you and help you fix yourself
before the damage is too severe. And, this message is
not limited to only women but also to those men who
have the sensibilities to be affected negatively by
relationship problems.
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